Yo, let the bass boom, this is a work anniversary diss,

We gotta roast Dave, the king of the parenthesis.

He’s got 47 tabs open, still searching for the fix,

Debugging a typo for ten hours, that’s just one of his tricks.

He says coffee is a personality, that’s a sad sight,

His whole existence is stuck in perpetual dark mode light.

He’ll hit you with a "well actually" before you can finish your sentence,

Dave, your whole life is a codebase that needs repentance.

You think you're Neo 'cause you stare at the matrix screen?

You're just a caffeine addict, the most basic developer we've seen!

Happy Anniversary, nerd, now close your brackets tight,

Or you'll be coding that same bug until the end of the night.